Strictly come parking?

Regular readers of this column will recall that I have mentioned the shenanigans of supermarket car parks before. It is the place that often brings out the worst in even the most patient and placid driver, and the location for some very interesting manoeuvres.

Reversing is something that we all have to do, along with turning right (although I did once read about someone who, having passed their driving test, decided not to carry on with their motoring career unless they could navigate a route where no right-hand turns were involved).

Reversing is as essential as moving forwards. It forms an important element of the driving test and as luck would have it because all cars are fitted with three mirrors, and in some cases fancy reversing warning sirens, it really shouldn’t be that difficult.

After all HGV drivers and bus drivers seem to manage moving very large and cumbersome vehicles in a backwards direction...so why then is it SO tricky for someone in an average sized car to reverse? After all it’s not like you are trying to berth the Ark Royal is it?

I am not sure if it’s the changing of the seasons or the fact that my ‘lunatic driver’ radar is particularly well tuned, but trust me – there is some bad backwards action going on out there at the moment.

And ladies PLEASE, I BEG YOU...do not continue to let the side down by joining in with these shocking driving habits. Bad driving is not exclusive – men and women of all ages are as good and bad as each other. However, if you want to see some truly awful reverse parking just get yourself down to any supermarket car park at lunchtime.

It’s often like a little dance. They go forwards, they go backwards oh and then forwards and oh yes backwards again...but this time we have the added interest of the wrenching of the steering wheel in one direction while they peer nervously over their shoulder.

Several additional attempts are made to either get in or out of a parking space in reverse, in some cases involving a little three-point pirouette. Then we have to endure the inevitable finale and unmistakable crescendo of broken glass and scraping body work.

And then there’s the encore as we all witness the drama of fist-shaking and remonstration of annoyed drivers. It’s not just the girls – boys can’t reverse either, but supermarket car parks at peak shopping time are not the place to practice.

Maybe these people should have paid more attention to mastering these moves when they were still paying for lessons, because supermarkets are there for wine purchases, chocolate and lipgloss supplies.