I’M A peaceful kind of person: I try not to squish snails on the path (it makes a mess of your trainers), I help old ladies across the road and generally emit peace and goodwill to all – all, that is, except bike thieves.

A few weeks ago my son became one of the 3,000 or so annual bike theft victims in Oxford when his bike was stolen one evening from the rack it was locked to in our front garden.

I’ve written a few bike columns since this took place simply to give me time to calm down and prevent my venom pouring forth with quite the intensity it was when I found out.

Let’s just say I’m pretty angry about it – or even let’s say that if professionals needed to show an example of someone getting angry to show why people should have anger management, they’d show me. (In fact, if the government needed a secret weapon to see off an armada or something then tell me they’ve nicked my bike and I’m charged to blow up.) Yes, I think bike thieves are the pits.

With my son’s bike it was simple. We’ve got a D-lock with a cable that runs through it that I put through the other (cheaper) bikes and usually I locked my son’s bike with the D-lock to the bike rack. Unfortunately this time my son just put the cable through the frame and omitted to use the D-lock. The steel cable was cut through by the thieves and the bike taken. OK, I need to count to 10 before I write anymore.

I’d heard one friend say that you should spend 10 per cent of the value of your bike on the lock.

This was repeated until one day this person had their bike taken.

My personal approach is – how much do you love your bike and how would you cope if it was nicked?

My fellow column-writer James Styring always makes the point about how important where you lock up your bike is. Somewhere near a main road, preferably attached to a ‘Sheffield’ hoop rack or something else unmovable is best (but not to a lamppost on a busy pavement where it will annoy everyone and risk getting its wheel stamped on).

I’d like to think that a D-lock was enough to safeguard your bike, but if you get a super small D-lock, thieves can’t open them with car jacks. Better still, one of the latest locks are zig-zag ‘cop’ locks from Trelock which are as good as D-locks but take up less space.

Another friend has a cable lock for his tandem with an alarm that blares if it’s cut through. It’s tempting to suggest that he should also wire it to the mains for a bigger shock, but I’m not that cruel.

Thankfully, the ultimate bike lock has now been invented – Dominic Hargreaves, a student who’d had three bikes pinched, has come up with a bike storage hoist. A cradle attached to a wall pulls the bike 2.5 metres into the air by remote control so thieves can’t reach the bike to cut the lock.

This might encourage a new generation of cat bike burglars to have a go, but for now there are plans afoot to put these up outside tube and train stations.

Finally, Oxford police do keep a shed full of recovered bikes that are believed to be stolen but have proven difficult to reunite with their owners.

So if you’re still pining after a stolen steed, you can always ask to take a look on the off chance that it might be among them – call them on 08458 505505.