Sir – Christopher Gray’s reviews get more hilarious each week. One of his latest could have been written by Alan Partridge, but as he has never heard of James Corden, I doubt if he has heard of Steve Coogan either.
The Restaurateur’s Lament or “Now we’ve heard it all!”
We’ve swept the floor, we’ve ironed the cloths
Everything seems just right
For important guests are on their way
To be entertained tonight
The Grays are coming — Hip! Hip! Hooray!
We must be at our best
But all’s not right!
A frown, a word twixt Rosemarie and Chris
Something’s wrong — the food, the wine,
The ambience’s amiss?
But no — it’s so much worse than this
We realise when we’re told
We’ve committed that unforgivable sin
“The finger bowl’s too cold!”
Ken Marsland, Kidlington
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