Sir – My father never forgot how, when he was a boy, there was hardly one household in the street in which he lived, that hadn’t received a telegram reporting the loss of a loved member of the family.

This summer I was returning by boat back to Oxford. It was a beautiful summer day and it felt so good to be alive. Just as we approached the bridge under the bypass we noticed a hearse going past with a coffin covered by a Union Jack and then another and another. I couldn’t help feeling how sad it was that these young men had been cut off in the prime of their lives and wouldn’t be able to continue to enjoy life.

I wish this could be brought home to those Members of Parliament who don’t really see war as the very last option.

When we leafleted in Oxford against the wars on Afghanistan and Iraq, we would often be approached by young soldiers who were not sure that these were the sort of wars in defence of their country, for which they had enlisted. One such soldier was one of the earliest casualties and he had seemed so kind and thoughtful.

When the memorial ceremonies become more thoughtful and less militaristic I will be only too keen to attend in respect of those who have died. But, our ceremonies still seem in a time warp with other young boys marching to trumpets in uniform. and that’s not really the way I want to show my respect and sorrow for all the dead and their grieving relatives.

I will continue to show that respect for every young life by campaigning against war.

Weapons are now so terrible and so indiscriminate that we have to find other ways of solving disputes.

Nuala Young, Councillor, St Clements