SANTA Claus needed to head home to the North Pole. Word had reached the elves that economies had to be made and jobs were in danger.

It needed the old fellah to calm the situation. He asked if I would sit in for him at a local school Christmas fair and dish out presents (that’s my story and I’m sticking to it).

More than 60 youngsters, some with family or friends, passed through the grotto’s tinsel arch and only one – a lad of three – asked if I was ‘real’. A white lie was necessary.

He was followed by three 14-year-old girls, an age group that usually shuns such events.

“Do you believe in Father Christmas?” I asked, trying to look and sound serious.

One pert miss, smiling from ear to ear, quickly replied: “We do – especially at this time of year!”

IF the number of red-robed Santas taking part in the annual fundraising run for Helen and Douglas House is anything to go by, the two respite centres for children and young people should be in for a handy cash gift.

Mums, dads, grandparents, children and babes-in-arms – all in traditional outfits – tackled the two-mile course.

The city council is also in line for a less deserved bonus if my experience was shared by others. I was a mere marshal, lending a little help. Parking in the Westgate car park cost £10.10 for my four-hour Sunday morning stay.

HISTORY repeated itself. Readers may recall that a couple of weeks ago a group of young Chinese music teachers wanted to be photographed with me. I was delighted, but so-called friends gave no opportunity to gloat at my good fortune.

It happened again, but with a fresh group of Oriental ladies as I stood on duty at the Broad Street/Turl Street junction. How could I refuse?

I was returning to my car (and that parking fee) when my old chum David Diment came into view.

“What did you expect wearing that outfit?” he said, pointing to my green, flimsy and ill-fitting elf’s costume. Crushed again!

CLOSING its doors today for almost a month to all but services over the Christmas period is New Road Baptist Church. Its members are genuine ‘giving’ folk, normally opening from 11am to 2pm, Mondays to Fridays, offering tea and coffee to all who might call.

Recently a number of people have abused the generosity with their unacceptable behaviour and foul language, making it hard for David, Linda and other helpers, so much so that the deacons have ordered a shutdown. After all, it is a church.

There’s always some lout prepared to spoil things.