Do you ever feel like you’re missing out on something? Over the past few months I’ve been thinking I might just be the one remaining person left in the country who hasn’t got tickets for the Olympics.

“Maybe it’s because you’re an Australian” one of my friends said or “maybe it’s because you’re not... well, you know, really all that sporty looking” said another.

(That was the one I’ve made a mental note not to send a Christmas card to, by the way).

After explaining that us ‘chubbies’ do indeed have eyes and a brain, and thus the ability to watch sports, I was still left thinking maybe I should have joined the crowds who hysterically thrust out their hand (and wallet) to nab tickets to sports they’ve never heard of.

Worse still, I’d even started thinking my workmate Trev was ‘lucky’ to have paid more than a thousand pounds for tickets to Wimbledon, followed by football……… in Coventry.

Anyway, recently I heard a politician, can’t remember which, loudly proclaim that the 2012 Olympics would be ‘The Greatest Show on Earth’!

So I guess it’s only natural people stampeded to the website, because you don’t want to be the only one that misses out, do you?.... Even if you can’t name any athletes who compete in half the sports you’ve signed up for. This is what really amused me, because when I looked at the list of sports which sold out quicker than a supermarket clears fans on a hot day, it struck me that I don’t know one single person who has ever, or would ever pay to see a game of table tennis, handball, water polo or synchronised swimming.

Nor do I know anyone who would part with cash to watch wrestling or judo.

In fact, I can actually recall my best friend’s own parents even made excuses to drop her off rather than hang around to watch her learning such a dull sport.

And don’t start me on the BMX. I may be wrong, but wasn’t the last BMX bike that anyone over the age of 12 showed any interest in, last seen flying into the sky at the end of a Steven Spielberg movie?

I know sports don’t have to be sexy to be fun – believe me I know this first hand.

From about the age of nine I spent every Saturday morning playing golf.

I also know I probably WILL find myself staying up late to watch telly during the Olympics for no other reason than it’s “The Olympics”.

Admittedly though, the sport I’m secretly looking forward to watching the most is archery, not the least because one of the American competitors, I think his name is Kevin Costner, is an incredible shot.

Plus if he wins I know most of the words to their national anthem. Although I tend to get lost after the ‘everything I do I do it for you’ bit.