AS soon as I heard the Love Island theme tune at 9pm, I felt the feminism leave my body.

I have lived in this country for long enough to recognise iconic catchphrases like 'I've got a text', 'my type on paper' and 'head turned', and I know who Molly-Mae and Ovie Soko are – however, I had never seen a full episode of the show.

This year, with two contestants from Oxfordshire in the mix, it was time for me to tune in.

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Earlier this month, many viewers from the LGBTQ community, like myself, were disheartened and offended by ITV commissioner Amanda Starvi, who said that queer contestants are a 'logistical difficulty'. In 2021, I question why this show has to continue to be a case study into heterosexuality.

Regardless, here I am, tuning in to make Love Island my personality for the next few months.

Half an hour in, I understand why year after year it is such a success, particularly during a pandemic when the nation has been forced inside their homes and denied the annual pleasure of a hot summer abroad.

Love Island offers escapism like no other and, like many viewers, I could see myself ditching my daily job to sunbathe in a luxurious villa in Majorca and have underwhelming conversations with fellow 'islanders'.

I can also see why Love-Island-themed parties have become a tradition for many.

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Bets can be placed on which couple will make it to the final and bag the £50,000 prize, and there are repeated phrases that lend themselves to Love Island bingo and drinking games.

Take a sip if one of the women says their type is 'tall, dark and handsome'; do a shot if a participant pulls a potential love interest 'for a chat' and down your drink if one of the men describes themselves as a 'player' – the options are endless and the island is your oyster. 

A few observations and questions:

1) I need subtitles – did Brad say he is a Libra or a labourer from Northumberland?
2) Why does everyone wear beachwear except Laura Whitmore? If you wear clothes, does this mean you are off the dating market?
3) Why do the men get to choose the women first, even if they do not indicate any interest in them?

Even more, while spin-the-bottle-like games were popular while I was at university, to me, it seems that forcing contestants to suck each other's toes and earlobes as an icebreaker is problematic in a time when sexual consent should take centre stage.

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The first episode felt underwhelming and old-fashioned. To keep old - and new - viewers entertained, Love Island needs to step into 2021, change with the times and reflect the gender, class and sexuality of the country.

Is this too much to ask of a reality show?

To be honest, I am just pleased I managed to catch the France-Switzerland penalty shootout, and I am not even a football fan.

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