Hello and welcome to yet another year of the good, bad and ugly from our elected representatives. And by small way of recognition, The Insider proudly presents the second, annual alternative honours list.

The Do As I say, Not As I Do Award: KEITH MITCHELL/DAVID ROBERTSON With growing concerns about air pollution, more cars on the road and daily gridlock, one would have thought the men in charge of our transport policy would set an example when telling us all to use public transport. Not a chance. Instead, the county council leader and his sidekick drove their cars into the centre of Oxford almost daily to park in their reserved spaces. And free.

The Vladimir Putin Democracy-In-Action Award: OXFORDSHIRE COUNTY COUNCIL This award is given for the sensitive way the authority handled the delicate issue of paid-for parking permits. What do you think happened when thousands of pounds of taxpayers' money was spent on a consultation with two-thirds of respondents saying they didn't want to pay? Yes, that's right - they completely ignored it.

The 'Does My Bum Look Big In This?' Award: TONY BRETT The Standards Board of England was involved when former city councillor Tony Brett, right, found himself on the wrong end of a personal attack from fellow councillor Lee Cole. Mr Cole remarked, in an email sent to all 48 city councillors, that Mr Brett sat on his "expanding arse" instead of getting his hands dirty with civic work. The episode certainly provided a little light relief at the Town Hall before the standards board threw out the complaint and Mr Brett lost his seat at the May local elections.

The Hot Air Award: DAVID CAMERON One year into his tenure, the Tory leader has huffed and puffed...but not achieved a lot except getting permission for a wind turbine at his West London home. His dedication to saving the planet stretched to cycling to Westminster... with a chauffeur-driven car in tow carrying all the things he couldn't manage. A new breed of Tory? Whom do you think you're kidding, Dave.

The George W Bush Trophy For International Relations: BORIS JOHNSON The father-of-four, fresh from his Liverpool faux pas in which he suggested Scousers gorged on self pity, excelled himself this time round for referring to "orgies of cannibalism and chief-killing" in Papua New Guinea. After his outburst, Mr Johnson said he would add the country to his global apology itinerary.

The Predictable Politician Award: KEITH MITCHELL Mr Mitchell picks up a second gong, this time for a classic political soundbite that looks like coming back to haunt him. Shortly after the Tories won control of County Hall in May, 2005, the pint-sized 60-year-old, nicknamed 'Kaiser Keith', promised "absolutely no cuts whatsoever". But guess what's around the corner next year for many vulnerable service users?

The Guardian Spelling And Grammar Award: MICHAEL WAINE/PAUL SMITH In an ironic dispatch from County Hall, the cabinet member for schools improvement misspelt the names of two high-level colleagues (one of them being the council chairman) and for good measure threw in at least five other basic grammatical errors. And to make matters worse, the authority's chief press officer admitted he hadn't even bothered to check for errors when he was asked to.

The 'We Told You So' Award: OXFORD CITY COUNCIL Recycling, warm weather, fortnightly collections, rats and maggots. We hate to say it, but. ...