MY OLD Yellow Pages was looking very tatty indeed from its constant use over the past year.

I was thrilled that a new copy arrived just a few days ago. I find it a very useful weapon against those little flying Oxford United supporters armed with stinger guns.

Yes, I’m afraid that Bea Bradley will be shocked to read that I kill wasps. Before she rushes to my home waving a ‘Thou shalt not kill’ banner, I will explain why I do it.

I am allergic to the little blighters’ sting. I inflate like the Michelin man. The last time it happened, my watch had to be cut off and the JR hospital advised me to just keep taking Piriton tablets and keep my arm in the air to drain the poison away.

Of course, this meant being confined to my home until the swelling went, or walking around Oxford with one’s arm in the air would get people thinking that I had either spotted a UFO or I needed to spend a penny.

Bea Bradley might forgive me a little bit when I say I only clobber those wasps in the same room as me, I don’t go hunting for them. I have tried opening windows but this lets more in rather than getting others out.

There is a downside to all this killing though – I don’t half break a lot of ornaments.

Good old Yellow Pages.

CHRIS BOSWELL Williamson Way Rose Hill Oxford