God knows, I'm usually no conspiracy theorist, much as I might secretly want to be. After all, I suspect it would be rather nice to think that the fate of the country lay in the hands of a secret organisation composed of senior businessman, capitalists and industrialists. After all, they couldn't possibly do a worse job than our present government (but, then again, neither could the slightly stupider children in a primary school class, come to think of it).
But, alas, I've never believed the Twin Towers were dynamited by the CIA, that the Jews were planning to take over the world, or that our leaders are all secretly seven-foot tall lizards.
But sometimes, information emerges that is so truly shocking that one half suspects that secret forces must be at work.
Take the Diana inquest, for example. What weird and strange developments that's throwing up. What's all this about a white Fiat, a flash of bright light as the car entered the tunnel, the mysterious blood level readings of Henri-Paul?
I previously thought the idea that Prince Philip, in cahoots with MI6, was behind her death was utterly ludicrous (although if anyone was going to bump off some dippy sloane duped into siring a couple of heirs for the crown when she had done the necessary, they would be the men for the job, I reckon. Besides, we don't want to expose the Duke of Edinburgh's machinations to the public just yet; we might yet need his help and that of his Army chums if things get any worse under our new Soviet-style Brownian government).
And then came the revelation about Dodi buying an engagement ring - and the scales, as they say, fell from my eyes. The son of Mohammed al Fayed, owner of Harrods, Egyptian multi-millionaire, spent ten thousand measly quid on an engagement ring for our English Rose. What a skinflint, a tightwad, a miser. He wanted to wed our lovely Princess Di, have his strange Middle Eastern ways with her, and he splashes out what you'd pay for a second hand Ford Focus? It's an insult to the entire nation.
Now if that wasn't made up by Special Branch to discredit Dodi and the al Fayeds, I can't imagine what was.
Still, Dodi - he didn't have Scottish blood in him, did he?