The young boy in front of us in the queue solemnly took a mobile phone out of his pocket and made a call. "It's OK mummy," he said, in a very North Oxford accent. "I've managed to get us a table at Browns."

Sure enough, a few minutes later his well-coiffed parents arrived to find their son at said table in the window, looking desperately pleased with himself.

Welcome to Browns, where small boys have mobile phones, ladies sip cocktails at all hours of the day and night, parents visit their student children, couples smooch and families lounge.

Browns has long been an Oxford foodie icon, famous for its glamorous waitresses and bustling atmosphere - and over the years has built a reputation that spreads far beyond the city boundaries.

The décor has recently altered slightly - it is more Scandinavian than Bohemian these days - but the bustling bar, huge lofty ceilings, whirring fans and stunning staff mean that Browns is still a theatre-style restaurant. All you have to do is sit back and enjoy. If only . . .

Our meeter-and-greeter, a ridiculously beautiful cool blonde, magicked us up a table with little fuss.

We knew what we wanted as soon as we opened the menus so all Browns had to do was produce some decent grub because the stage was set and the hard work had already been done. Which is why I was so furious when the kitchen messed up. What's the point of all this razzmatazz and glitz and glamour if the chefs can't cook?

I had ordered the angel pasta tossed in tomato, black olive, caper and chilli sauce and topped with shaved parmesan. In my mind I had imagined a pungent, spicy, oily sauce - simple but spectacular when done well.

Mr Greedy had his eye on the Browns bacon cheeseburger with dry cured smoked bacon and emmenthal served with iceberg, red onion, beef tomato, pickle, celeriac coleslaw and crisp seasoned chips. Sadly, what the burger came with was totally irrelevant, because it was stone cold, as were the chips.

Yes, we should have sent it back, but having waited 35 minutes for our food we only had 20 minutes to go until our parking ticket ran out and couldn't spare half an hour waiting for another one.

As for my lunch, I knew within seconds that it wasn't going to live up to expectations because the pasta was totally overcooked - boiled to death is more accurate.

The chef obviously missed the week of his college cookery course when they dealt with how to heat up food and cook pasta. Even my nine year-old son can cook a decent plate of penne!

They hadn't drained it properly either because the sauce was watery and tasted more like ratatouille than the fierce, sharp combination I was expecting. All the individual flavours of the olives, oil, chilli and capers had disappeared as quickly as my faith in Browns.

Browns should take a leaf out of La Vina's book, a new Spanish restaurant that has just opened in Wallingford.

It has the same capacity as Browns, and similar attention to external detail, although the eye-candy is definitely male here.

We only popped in for lunch but it was great to find something so cosmopolitan in the middle of this market town. This huge and traditionally decorated restaurant is welcoming, and has a reasonably-priced menu to boot.

The big difference was of course the food. La Vina's kitchen is open-plan and tiny. I'd like to see the Browns chefs cooking their wares in full view of customers.

Bread and olives were produced to start, followed by their three tapas dishes for £6.95 option, and it was all authentic and tasted great.

The two of us tried a bit of everything - from the predictable patatas bravas to the more innovative pollo al estilo pedro (chicken cooked with onion and prunes) the boquerones en vinagre (anchovies marinated in garlic and olive oil) as well and the Spanish staples, chorizo al vino tinto (chorizo cooked in red wine) and judias al ajillo (white and green beans cooked in garlic).

A couple on a nearby table were sharing a mouthwatering-looking paella served in a raised black dish, which I earmarked for my next visit.

Our tapas arrived promptly and the chicken was declared an instant hit with my Norwegian friend who said it was the best food she had eaten in England so far! The rest of the dishes lived up to expectations and the bill was reasonable.

Browns, 5-11 Woodstock Road, Oxford OX2 6HA 01865 511995 La Vina, 10-11 Market Place, Wallingford. 08451 262954