Soul Food

Letting myself into our luxurious room at Lifehouse – an uber spaceship of relaxation that seems to have landed in the Essex countryside – I wondered where my friend was.

Perhaps she was having a look around our stylish hotel, enjoying a swim in the vast pool or being massaged to within an inch of her life with a last-minute spa booking?

And then I saw her feet hanging over the end of her bed. She was flat out – we’re talking sparko here and I was hugely impressed that she was taking the relaxing element so seriously.

But that’s the thing about Lifehouse. It gets you as soon as you walk through the sleek, urbane, minimalist doors. Everything about it is slick, uber, contemporary and, above all, calming. You might as well hand over your stressed haggard soul along with your luggage at the reception desk.

The three-hour journey up the M25 and along the A12 didn’t help, but being an Essex virgin, I had no idea how far it was.

But bizarrely traffic was pretty free on this dark winter’s night and I arrived in time for supper.

And so I woke my gently snoring friend and we went to find the bar before descending for dinner in the sexy Skandy style restaurant where we dined like queens. We were even allowed a bottle of wine with the delicious meal and relaxed in the bar afterwards, sighing with relief that Lifehouse wasn’t a health farm type retreat and that relaxation in its many forms was the name of the game.

And boy they do it well. From the juice bar to the spa hub, the massage chairs to the private sleep pods, relaxation is in bountiful supply.

But as we only had one night and the following day to let it all soak in, we started early, gobbling down our breakfast to get to our first spa treatment in time – the fabulous sounding OBE or Oriental Bathing Experience.

Like Alice in Wonderland we had to wait in our robes by a closed door until ushered into the dark, exotically frangranced interior, and there in a tiled ornate steamy room the ritual began that was to last a whole hour-and-a-half. First up we had our feet oiled and massaged, then we walked through to a large dark and extremely cold pool where we had to shiver for a good ten minutes to emerge and inhale the special healing lotions and potions while traversing the reflexology circle. Next up was warmer pool with fountains, all bathed in the same exotic lighting before we were led into the last room, laid down and massaged with hot stones. When they’d finished we were taken to a series of sleep pods to slumber in our transcendent state.

But as I have the hyperactivity levels of a small child, as did my friend (we have four kids each, and therefore aren’t very good at sitting down) we decided to skip the pods and try out some yoga instead.

Classes in everything from meditation to zumba are available and running all day and there are also life coaches available to guide you through eating, health, fitness and gardening(!?) issues, should you so require. The yoga was brilliant. And having never tried it before I fell in love with the stringent stretching exercises – which are much harder than they look – and promised myself I’d enrol on a course when I got home.

A quick lunch and then we were back in the hub for a very efficient and long-lasting pedicure before the inbuilt alarm bells began to go off. And just like The Lone Ranger we knew our work here was done.

But my overhwhelming impressions were of huge admiration. The facilities had everything covered, the staff were amazing – friendly, polite and nothing was too much trouble; from the receptionist to the night porter, a great reflection on the Lifehouse.

Had I had my time again I probably would have gone for a proper facial or massage rather than a new concept/fad treatment, but it’s fun to try new things.

The food was great, and compared to all the other spas I’ve been to, the Lifehouse is really uncommercial and a real ‘away-from-it-all’ destination.

In fact, the Lifehouse is so timeless and seamless that I could have stayed for months and as the doors closed behind us and we set off in opposite directions, I knew that the party may be over, but the memory would survive far longer.

* Lifehouse, Frinton Road, Thorpe-le-Soken, Essex. CO16 0JD. www.lifehouse.co.uk 01255 860050.

The OBE treatment costs £122 each.

Lead-in rates start from £195 for a ‘Time Out’ break which includes: £50 treatment voucher; award-winning breakfast; three-course contemporary British cuisine dinner; meet and greet from Thorpe-le-Soken train station or valet car parking service available; porterage of luggage; use of fluffy white robe during your visit, plus complimentary slippers; unlimited use of the swimming pool, gym, hydrotherapy pool, salt inhalation room, sauna, steam room and chill area; unlimited use of all grounds and gardens; full access to the activities programme; access to a daily country walk with a member of the fitness team. To book or for more information, call 01255 860 050 or email enquiries@lifehouse.co.uk