You’re pitching a show about UFOs, right? So, who you gonna call: an astrophysicist? A boffin armed with all the logical explanations and knowhow needed to explain it all away? Nah, mate. Get Shaun Ryder in!

Shaun, of the Happy Mondays, is up for it (yay!) having seen a shining UFO as a kid (without any psychedelic drugs either, he promises) and he’s on a mission for answers.

Now, you’ve probably already put him in the crackpot category, where most alien witnesses end up, but hold on! It is infinitely less mad a phenomenon than people getting their knickers in a twist over Doctor Who (which is a kids’ show, people!). Because, if you challenge your beliefs you might open your mind, man, with Shaun Ryder on UFOs (History Channel, 8pm Sundays).

And, Shaun is not actually that mad a choice for this show, which sends him off to Chile and then Britain, asking people their alien abduction stories, meeting ufologists and respected academics who are trying to rain on everyone’s parade by dismissing everything (boo!).

Shaun, with his mad, wonky face, is genuine which instantly makes him an infinitely more engaging telly presence than most peculiar presenters (er, Julia Bradbury, anyone?).

As he watches the orange-robed members of the Aetherius Society – a group who have gathered under the tutelage of Richard Lawrence to worship aliens and chant and ‘om’ at them - he looks as though he might vomit, but he’s pretty open-minded, as one would expect after a lifetime of experimentation. “Yeah, most people will think they’re crackers,” he says afterwards, “but it’s no more ridiculous than a lot of the religious stuff people believe. So let’s respect that.”

Shaun is in his element chatting to an alien abductee who revisits the Stafford scene where he was probed by some Pink Panther-type beings. Really, it’s two likeminded blokes smoking in a back garden, talking about being beamed up, but it’s oddly reassuring, and very British. Another British institution is David Dimbleby. And since he got a prawn tattooed on his shoulder (yes, it was supposed to be a scorpion but what can you do?) the BBC has decided to run with the theme and make the thoroughly salty Britain and The Sea (BBC1 Sunday 9pm and catch-up). There’s Dimbles, chipper and chippy as ever, sailing the Solent, marvelling how the mighty oaks nearby built our shipping history and taking a tour of the HMS Victory. I can’t think of a man I’d rather be on a boat with and, tatts or no tatts, I’d love to see him crack open the rum and sing a few sea shanties, but I’m waiting for the BBC to respond to my request.

And, dear God, at the other end of the spectrum is Peter Andre’s 60-Minute Makeover (ITV2, weekdays 2pm). Now, I really hate telly snobs dissing everything humdrum and real. But this is the lowest of the low.

Pete turns up and apologises for knowing diddly squat about DIY before embarking on the overhaul of someone’s home (and yes, of course there’s a sob story about why the recipient deserves it).

He’s no more annoying than Clare Sweeney, but what is annoying is him trying to sex things up, much to the mystification of everyone involved. He’s there with his mahogany pecs out, bodging toddler tasks such as hanging a picture and flashing those sad puppydog eyes. It is curiously repellent, and he doesn’t seem to be cheering up any of the down-on-their-luck housewives with his banter about ‘getting sweaty’.

In fact, you get the sense they’re all desperate to get their free feature wall done, send him packing back to whichever waxing salon he came from and forget the whole sorry episode.