As Brazil 2014 nears the final in a mere NINE days and tension mounts, it’s time to look at who’s left in... No, not the teams, but the WAGs.

With Our Colleen and Alex Curran having hauled their sorry Gucci-clad rears home (er, via Barbados or similar, the poor darlings) let’s have a look at which international WAGs are left in the running for the overall title of Queen of the World Cup WAGs. Here are my faves for the top trophy: 

Hot Babe Lingerie model Ann-Kathrin Brommel, 25, girlfriend of German star 22-year-old Mario Gotze, is about to launch a pop career under the alias Trina B. How very WAG of her!

Mrs Do-Good Spanish-born Yolanthe Sneijder-Cabau, 29, is married to Holland midfielder Wesley Sneijder, 30. The model and TV presenter has her own fashion line but is now launching herself into charity work. Marrying a millionaire then wishing to rid the world of poverty is a quintessential WAG move. Top WAGness!

Hometown Sweetie Arguably the world’s best footballer, Argentina’s Lionel Messi, 27, met Antonella Roccuzzo, 26, before he achieved global fame having grown up together in the Argentine town of Rosario. As we’ve seen with Our Colleen, this sort of hometown girl often turns out to be world-class on the WAG stage – a Swarovski in the rough, if you will.

Besides battling WAGs, an on-pitch antic that has caught my eye is the trend for evermore elaborate bandages and plasters being worn by players to cover their boo-boos.

When Christian Noboa of Ecuador clashed heads with a French player, resulting in a bloodied head, the physio decided to put a netted hat over his entire top half (that’s only a slight exaggeration). He looked like a Christmas pud ready to be steamed, which cheered us up no end.

Also resembling a prize pudding was Algeria’s Sofiane Feghouli. Again after a head bump, the physio tried out a number of bandage combinations before settling on an extra large wodge of cotton wool pinned to the side of his head. He looked as though he had half a meringue strapped on. How deliciously daft.

Finally, I am loving the simple genius that is the World Cup theme song, the chorus is a mere one word, Brazil, repeated twice (Brazil, Brazil). Try singing it slowly while mimicking an amorous and drunk old Spanish bloke. Perfect.