3:28pm Friday 15th August 2008
By First Timer
When I first found out I was pregnant I was so pleased but also really apprehensive about being pleased. I know this sounds really odd but I'm pregnant by means of fertility treatment and it's been a long journey. I didn't, and still don't, want to be too pleased in case anything goes wrong.
I don't want to fall in love with this little person inside me, because if there was suddenly a problem and I lost him/her it would smash my heart. As it is, I'm falling a little more in love everyday and in the event of such loss I'd like to think I'd get over it more easily ’ but I know I'm probably talking rubbish.
However, there is more than doom and gloom to this pregnancy. I usually eat a fairly healthy diet, but for almost a month I could eat nothing but pizza and oven chips with fizzy orange ’ vile! I couldn't bear the thought of anything healthy; fruit - no thank you; veg ’ I don't think so; just give me carbs and keep them coming!
Eating is now less problematic and made all the easier by having a fab husband who is not only a great cook but has also mollycoddled me shamelessly ’ I know I'm very, very lucky.
The other outstanding symptom of pregnancy is the tiredness. I had heard of the fabled tiredness of pregnant women and thought that it wouldn't apply to me. How wrong can you be? It's a weariness that seems rooted in your soul, you find yourself constantly yawning, your body feels like it's getting over a bout of flu and sleep is all that is on your mind. More than once I have gone to bed within an hour of getting home from work and have slept for twelve hours straight and in the morning I've felt wonderful!
Talking of which, I must end now. Goodnight...
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